By this time, a lot of you should be finished with the attack phase of the Dukan Diet, or nearing the end of it. How are you feeling? Pretty crappy? Like you just want to listen to Purple Rain on repeat and cry into a Monte Cristo sandwich? I know the feeling. My dears, you are probably suffering from what is known as induction flu. No, this is not a new strain of flu that has sprouted out of a flamingos arse or anything. It's a result of you doing a kick ass job with your dieting!
Induction flu occurs after a few days low carb eating and in my experience, lasts about 2-3 days. I actually have it right now as I have started back on the attack phase to join my readers that are also dieting. I feel like a bag of smashed a-hole as I write this, but alas, the blog must go on! With a low carb diet, you have removed the food that your body has always used as a source of energy, so it doesn't know what the heck is going on. Your body is thinking "Is their a shortage of food? Are we on vacation in Ethiopia? I better prepare to burn this fat because I'm about to go into ketosis." After you finally reach ketosis, your body will start burning your back fat for energy instead of waiting for you to tackle the bread stick peddler at Fazoli's (Oh happy day).
What are the signs of ketosis and the subsequent induction flu? It may vary for other people, but let me start with the most noticeable one-- terrible breath and a metallic taste in your mouth. I'm not sure what causes either one of these mouth dysfunctions, but when I start to get that taste in my mouth, and you will know it when you get it, I'm all like "Where is the scale? I can taste my fat burning! Anyone have a sugar free breath mint?" Although the bad breath is rather unpleasant, just carry a mini bottle of Listerine around with you. Your chronic halitosis should be the first sign that you are doing everything right. Welcome it with open arms! Heck, I'll even give you a high five for getting to that point. Just remember to hold your breath if you get into my personal bubble. If your partner has anything to say about your rank breath, just scream "YOU'LL FORGET ABOUT MY KITTY LITTER BREATH WHEN YOU SEE MY BANGING BODY!" And believe me, they will. Walk around in your bikini to distract away from your stench.
Apart from being a little grumpy, I also experienced a mild headache, achy joints, and stayed thirsty as a mofo. I also get a little emotional. 3 seconds of Sarah McLachlan and her abused animal commercial and the tears just start flowing. Oh, I forgot the worst part... The fatigue. I get so tired during the first week of strict low carb dieting. I will come home from work, gnaw on some protein, and then nap, wake up, shower, gnaw on more protein, and back to bed. Don't worry though, as awful as induction flu sounds, you will gladly go through it if it means you will finally start to lose some weight. Like I said, it usually only lasts a few days and you are back to normal. Although it is hard to keep going when you're experiencing some of these symptoms, just think of it as your body detoxing from all of the junk you have been putting in it and every minute you feel like crap is that much closer to getting to your final goal. Don't doubt yourself. You are stronger than you think you are!
If you have started the cruise phase and have allowed yourself a cheat meal, you may notice that something funny has happened to you. After I completed the attack phase and was probably about two weeks into the cruise phase, I thought I would treat myself to a small order of curly fries from Arby's. After all, they are are my favorite and I earned those fries, darn it! I indulged and ate a few of them and threw the rest of them away, because even though I was allowing myself a treat, you just can't go buck wild or you'll be the size of the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man again before you know it. I guess it was about an hour or so after my lunch break that I got deathly ill. Luckily I have a bathroom attached to my office, so I didn't have to crawl too far to hurl. And boy do I mean hurl.
After you have been eating your low fat lean meats, clean veggies, and cutting out those evil carbs, your body cannot handle greasy fast food restaurants. Do not make my mistake unless you have someone to hold your hair back while you ralph into your handbag. Rather than go for something myocardial infarction inducing like I did, treat yourself with a little something that you can actually hold down. If you do eat something that makes you sick, do not enter "projectile vomiting" into the exercise tab on My Fitness Pal to see how many calories your burned. That, my friends, is what they call an eating disorder. If you want me to help you reach your goals, you have to promise me no throwing up if you accidentally eat something you're not supposed to. You don't want your teeth to fall out. No matter how buff you are, people will still notice a toothless grin more. Leave that look to the convicted felons. It's very hard to pull off without any street cred.
Lastly, for those of you who just can't seem to get the scale to move, I want you to look at the photo below:
You are more than a number! Don't classify yourself by what your scale says. The four women in the middle are all around the same height, but all four of their bodies display a different weight distribution. All women are unique and we are all shaped differently. If you want to hear something really crazy and that will probably make you feel better about your own body shape, then prepare yourself, I am about about to share my pants size vs. my dress size. I am about 5'6" tall and I wear a size 4 in pants, but I recently went wedding dress shopping and I am a dress size 14/16! Now that makes it very difficult to find something that will fit. I am shaped like an upside down triangle and there is nothing I can do about it except laugh and ask if they have any backless options I can cram my upper body into. There is no shame in what you weigh, and there is no shame in number is sewn inside of your clothes. Despite what popular culture tells us, those numbers have no representation on the person attached to them. I don't know about you all, but I am more than a number. I am effing fabulous, giant rib cage and all. *Hair flip.
And as promised, a healthy recipe to take into your weekend! This recipe should be saved for the cruise phase and only for a day that you have really worked hard because it is definitely a treat!
Bridget's Low Carb Pizza Quesadilla
I love pizza. I would marry pizza if the harlot would have me (Sorry to my fiance). There were many nights I would lay awake at night and think of how great I was going to do the next day so I could eat one slice pizza over the weekend. I probably need a pizza intervention. Oh well. Can't stop, won't stop.
 |
| My fiance hid my ring under a pepperoni. |
-Turkey pepperoni
-Fat free shredded cheese, I use the Italian blend
-1 tbsp spaghetti sauce
-1 low carb tortilla, I use X-treme Health or something like that. They come in a maroon pkg
Spray a little Pam in your pan and turn it on medium/high heat. When the pan is warm, throw your tortilla in it. Take your cheese and sprinkle it over 1/2 of the tortilla. Use as much as you want, but remember we are going to fold this over, so don't go too crazy or you'll have a big cheesy mess. After you sprinkle your cheese, add a layer of pepperoni over the cheese, sprinkle with more cheese, add another layer of pepperoni, the take your tablespoon of spaghetti sauce and drizzle it over your pepperoni/cheese layers.Turn the heat down to medium/low heat. Add a couple more layers of pepperoni and cheese over the sauce and then take your empty side of the tortilla and fold it over your pepperoni and cheese. When the underside gets crispy, flip it to the other side and let it crisp up. After it gets crispy and all the cheese is melted on the inside, you're ready to eat. You feel like you are getting pizza without all of the carbs or calories. Take it easy on the spaghetti sauce though because like the foods from my post on
Weigh In Wednesday, spaghetti sauce is loaded with
HIDDEN SUGARS! You can leave the sauce off completely if you want to, but it just makes it more pizza-esque if you have it on there.
And there you have it, a few explanations for why you've not been feeling so hot these last few days and a recipe to make you feel like you're cheating on Dukan with pizza.
I also want to say thank you to everyone who has been sharing my blog with others. I cannot believe it when I say this, but I have had OVER 4,000 page views on this little blog in a little over a week! It is so overwhelming and exciting to think that so many people are reading these posts and are starting on their journey to not only better health, but also a journey to confidence. So many people I don't even know have been sending me the nicest messages and thanking me for helping them to finally find the motivation to take control of their weight. Everyone keeps telling me that I'm such an inspiration to them, but really, you guys are an inspiration to me. It means so much to be able to help people take control of their lives and help them feel comfortable in their own skin. I know this is going to sound cheesy, but talking to all of these new people has made this last week and a half one of the best I have ever had. I've been feeling very useless and like I don't really have a purpose here lately, which is the main reason I started this blog. I just wanted a hobby to keep from dwelling on my mundane life. I never knew that people would actually read this stuff! I am so humbled and so excited to hear more from you all! Keep me posted on how your diets are going.
Thank you guys for making me feel better about myself. Keep up the good
work and remember, I'm always here for you when you have your weak
moments. Sometimes a girl just needs to eat a whole container of gelato to feel better. We will get through this together and you will become the
version of yourself that you aspire to be. Once again, thank you all for
everything! You all make me so happy.
Your fellow recovering fat girl,
--Bridget
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